I never said I was suffering from a broken heart, oh no. But maybe a little bit of "feelings hurt" would be the appropriate response. This year so far has had so many ups and downs that the Free Fall at Six Flags couldn't even handle the volume. From jobs to relationships to finances.... Lawd have mercy me.. I need a change and I need it fast. Of course, one is coming soon, but I sure hope it is a change for a better like I'm imagining. We all know my imagination can run wild sometimes.
When it comes to jobs, I loved my first official job as an LPN. The doctor's office I worked at gave me alot of experience in seeing different procedures, starting IV's, and medications. I loved the doctor's I worked for and the people I worked with. But the drive became a bit much, as we all know GAS has become a huge factor in why most Americans are going broke. So I had to look for something closer. Came across what I thought would be an awesome job but I was dead wrong. I was hired as a nurse and ended up being a Secretary. I sit here wondering "What in the world did I work so hard in Nursing school for if this is what I'm doing?". I've been lied too, degraded, and simply unappreciated. So, it made the decision to move back closer to home much, much easier. Of course, I'm moving back in with my mom (first time in 12 years) and won't have a job waiting so we'll see....
Then relationships. Financial problems cause relationship problems. Simple as that. Fighting, arguing, lying, hiding, and the list could go on and on. Love isn't always the glue that keeps two people together. You still need the humor and the passion. You need to be able to not sweat the small stuff and deal with the large stuff. So needless to say, it hasn't been perfect. But hey, what is?
Oh Financial crises that has everyone on the edge of their seats. Underpaid, overworked, unappreciated, and always in limbo of where we stand in our financial situations. It's enough stress paying bills, imagine the stress of wondering HOW you are going to pay bills. So many people deal with this worry everyday. I am one of them. God somehow has blessed me, in that I have yet to have anything shut off or unable to make payment. But that's not to say I don't still worry about it. Even in my most comfortable state of mind, my main worry is how my bills will get paid. Lord forbid something happen to me, I wouldn't know how in the world I would survive, much less provide for my children.
Then you have certain People (no names will be mentioned) that decide to play your emotions like a game on XBOX. One day they talk to you like you're their best friend, the next day they act like they never knew you. They tell you things to pull you into their sick and twisted game then release you to fall and slam into the ground. Pretty harsh wake up call I guess. But it still sucks. And you know who you are. We all go through personal crises, doesn't mean you cut someone out of your life completely. Try considering other's feelings before you make the decision to treat them like crap. They might actually be worthy of a lasting friendship. But you'll never know, will you? But never the less, I've moved on from it. Just another lesson learned. It was fun while it lasted.... blah, blah, blah.
Honestly, Adele - 21 has been the soundtrack of my life lately. Every time I listen to it (everyday), it speaks to me in different ways. She sings how I feel and I feel what she is singing.
But on my new journey, my new beginning, my new move back home, I wish the bad luck to evade me and for life to give me the chance to live a content and fullfilling existence. Bid me farewell to this portion of my life and welcome me to a new chapter. I am ready. I am ready. I am so ready....
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